Biblical Fact

Q:  Does the Bible define marriage?

A:  Some people say passages in Matthew and Mark do, but they're actually passages that condemn divorce.  Check them out:

Matthew 19:3-9
Some Pharisees came to him, and to test him they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause?"  He answered, "Have you not read that the one who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'?  So they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."  They said to him, "Why then did Moses command us to give a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her?"  He said to them, "It was because you were so hard-hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another commits adultery." 

Mark 10:2-12
Some Pharisees came, and to test him [Jesus] they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?"  He answered them, "What did Moses command you?"  They said, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her."  But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you.  But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.'  'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.'  Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

Then in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter.  He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery." 

Marriage in the Bible

Jesus does describe marriage in the above verses, and nowadays it's the most common kind of marriage.  But he doesn't condemn other types of marriage.  And he never hesitates to condemn things he disapproves of, like hypocrisy, or wealth, or condemning people who condemn others. 

There are many other types of marriage described in the Bible:

1.  Second Samuel 15:16 says that King David had ten concubines.  He actually had a lot more than that, but I couldn’t find the appropriate verse to prove it. 

2.  David also had many wives at the same time.  Second Samuel 11 documents his marriage to Bathsheba, and First Samuel 25 documents his marriage to Abigail.

3.  First Kings 11 documents that King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines.

4.  Genesis 20 documents how Abraham had two wives at the same time.  One was his half-sister Sarai.  The other was Sarai’s slave-girl, Hagar. 

5.  At the end of Sodom and Gomorrah (Genesis 19:30-38), Lot’s daughters became pregnant by their father. 

6.  In Genesis 4:19, a guy named Lamech married two wives. 

7.  In Genesis 20:17, King Abimelech had a wife and female slaves that bore his children. 

8.  In Genesis 22, Nabor had a wife and a concubine, both of whom bore his children.

9.  In Genesis 25:6, Abraham had several more sons by several more concubines. 

10. In Genesis 26:34, Esau took two wives at the same time. 

11. In Genesis 29:15, Jacob married two women. 

12. In Genesis 38, Onan was sent in to father children for his dead brother’s widow, named Tamar.  Later, Tamar was made pregnant by her father-in-law.

13. Exodus 6:20 documents the fact that Amram married Jochebed, his father’s sister, and she bore him Aaron and Moses.

14. In the book of Hosea, Hosea was ordered by God to marry a prostitute. 

15. In the book of Esther, Esther (the hero) joined the harem of the King. 

16. The book of Amos demanded that all Jewish men abandon their foreign wives and children.

 

New Testament Comments on Marriage 

1 Corinthians 7:9
But if they are not practicing self-control, they should marry.  For it is better to marry than to be aflame with passion.

1 Corinthians 7:27
Are you bound to a wife?  Do not seek to be free.  Are you free from a wife?  Do not seek a wife.

1 Corinthians 7:32-34
I want you to be free from anxieties.  The unmarried man is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to please the Lord; but the married man is anxious about the affairs of the world, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided.  And the unmarried woman and the virgin are anxious about the affairs of the Lord, so that they may be holy in body and spirit; but the married woman is anxious about the affairs of the world, how to please her husband.

1 Corinthians 10:29
For why should my liberty be subject to the judgment of someone else's conscience?

 

Traditional Family Values

There are many Bible passages that order us not to judge or condemn others.  (To see the whole list, click on 'Sinners and sin' from the main menu.)  What does the Bible say about people who defend their judging by saying that they are working to save Traditional Marriage?

Matthew 15:6-8
[Jesus says] "So, for the sake of your tradition, you make void the word of God.  You hypocrites!  Isaiah prophesied rightly about you when he said:  'This people honors me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.'"

Mark 7:8-9
[Jesus says] "You abandon the commandment of God and hold to human tradition."  Then he said to them, "You have a fine way of rejecting the commandment of God in order to keep your tradition!"

Mark 7:13
[Jesus says] "thus making void the word of God through your tradition that you have handed on."

Colossians 2:8
See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the universe, and not according to Christ.

 

Other Condemnations -- Divorce, Lawyers, and Bankers

We have seen that the biblical condemnaton of homosexuals is surprisingly weak.  The best-case scenario is three and two-thirds verses that condemn gay men, and one and two-thirds verses that condemn gay women. 

Just for the sake of comparison, here are nine Bible passages that condemn divorce:

1.  Malachi 2:16 
For I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel, and covering one’s garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts.  So take heed to yourselves and do not be faithless.

2.  Leviticus 21:7
They shall not marry a prostitute or a woman who has been defiled; neither shall they marry a woman divorced from her husband.

3.  Leviticus 21:14
A widow, or a divorced woman, or a woman who has been defiled, a prostitute, these he shall not marry. 

4.  Deuteronomy 24:1-4
Suppose a man enters into marriage with a woman, but she does not please him because he finds something objectionable about her, and so he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house; she then leaves his house and goes off to become another man's wife.  Then suppose the second man dislikes her, writes her a bill of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house (or the second man who married her dies); her first husband, who sent her away, is not permitted to take her again to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that would be abhorrent to the Lord, and you shall not bring guilt on the land that the Lord your God is giving you as a possession.

5.  Matthew 5:31-32
“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’  But I say to you that anyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of unchastity, causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

6.  Matthew 19:6-9
“So they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”  They said to him, “Why then did Moses command us to give a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her?”  He said to them, “It was because you were so hard-hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another commits adultery.”

7.  Mark 10:2-12
Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?"  He answered them, "What did Moses command you?"  They said, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her."  But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you.  But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.'  For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.'  So they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."  Then in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter.  He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery."

8.  Luke 16:18
[Jesus says] "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and whoever marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.

9.  1 Corinthians 7:10-11
To the married I give this command -- not I but the Lord -- that the wife should not separate from her husband.  (But if she does separate, let her remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife

Here are some Bible passages that condemn lawyers.  (Two of them only condemn divorce lawyers.)  They're hard to count -- in one passage, Jesus says "woe to you lawyers!" three times.  So you decide how many passages there are. 

1.  Luke 11:45-47, 52
One of the lawyers answered him, “Teacher, when you say these things, you insult us too.”  And he [Jesus] said, “Woe also to you lawyers!  For you load people with burdens hard to bear, and you yourselves do not lift a finger to ease them.  Woe to you!  For you build the tombs of the prophets whom your ancestors killed. . . . Woe to you lawyers!  For you have taken away the key of knowledge; you did not enter yourselves, and you hindered those who were entering.”

2.  Matthew 19:6
[Jesus says] “So they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

3.  Mark 10:9
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." 

4.  1 Corinthians 6:1-7
When any of you has a grievance against another, do you dare to take it to court before the unrighteous, instead of taking it before the saints?  Do you not know that the saints will judge the world?  And if the world is to be judged by you, are you incompetent to try trivial cases?  Do you not know that we are to judge angels – to say nothing of ordinary matters?  If you have ordinary cases, then, do you appoint as judges those who have no standing in the church?  I say this to your shame.  Can it be that there is no one among you wise enough to decide between one believer and another, but a believer goes to court against a believer – and before unbelievers at that?  In fact, to have lawsuits at all with one another is already a defeat for you.  Why not rather be wronged?  Why not rather be defrauded? 

Here are eleven passages that condemn bankers and anyone else who charges interest. 

1.  Deuteronomy 15:1-2
At the end of every seven yours you shall grant a release.  And this is the manner of the release:  every creditor shall release what he has lent to his neighbor; he shall not exact it of his neighbor, his brother, because the Lord’s release has been proclaimed. 

2.  Deuteronomy 23:19
You shall not lend upon interest to your brother, interest on money, interest on victuals, interest on anything that is lent for interest.

3.  Exodus 22:25
If you lend money to my people, to the poor among you, you shall not deal with them as a creditor; you shall not exact interest from them.

4.  Leviticus 25:36-37
Do not take interest in advance or otherwise make a profit from them, but fear your God; let them live with you.  You shall not lend them your money at interest taken in advance, or provide them food at a profit.

5.  Nehemiah 5:1-12
Now there arose a great outcry of the people and of their wives against their Jewish brethren.  For there were those who said, “With our sons and our daughters, we are many; let us get grain, that we may eat and keep alive.”  There were also those who said, “We are mortgaging our fields, our vineyards, and our houses to get grain because of the famine.”  And there were those who said, “We have borrowed money for the king’s tax upon our fields and our vineyards.  Now our flesh is as the flesh of our brethren, our children are as their children; yet we are forcing our sons and our daughters to be slaves, and some of our daughters have already been enslaved; but it is not in our power to help it, for other men have our fields and our vineyards.”  I was very angry when I heard their outcry and these words.  I took counsel with myself, and I brought charges against the nobles and the officials.  I said to them, “You are exacting interest, each from his brother.”  And I held a great assembly against them, and said to them, “We, as far as we are able, have bought back our Jewish brethren who have been sold to the nations; but you even sell your brethren that they may be sold to us!”  They were silent, and could not find a word to say.  So I said, “The thing that you are doing is not good.  Ought you not to walk in the fear of our God to prevent the taunts of the nations our enemies?  Moreover I and my brethren and my servants are lending them money and grain.  Let us leave off this interest. Return to them this very day their fields, their vineyards, their olive orchards, and their houses, and the hundredth of money, grain, wine, and oil which you have been exacting of them.” Then they said, “We will restore these and require nothing from them.  We will do as you say.” 

6.  Psalm 15:1, 5
O Lord, who may abide in your tent?  Who may dwell on your holy hill?  . . . [those] who do not lend money at interest, and do not take a bribe against the innocent.

7.  Proverbs 28:1, 8
The wicked flee when no one pursues, but the righteous are as bold as a lion. ... One who augments wealth by exorbitant interest gathers it for another who is kind to the poor. 

8.  Ezekiel 18:5-9
If a man is righteous and does what is lawful and right … [if he] does not take advance or accrued interest … such a one is righteous; he shall surely live, says the Lord God. 

9.  Ezekiel 18:10-11, 13
If he has a son who is violent, a shedder of blood, who does any of these things (though his father does none of them), who ... takes advance or accrued interest; shall he then live?  He shall not. 

10. Ezekiel 18:14, 17
But if this man has a son who sees all the sins that his father has done, considers, and does not do likewise, . . . [if he] withholds his hand from iniquity, takes no advance or accrued interest . . . he shall not die for his father’s iniquity; he shall surely live.

11. Ezekiel 22:12
In you, they take bribes to shed blood; you take both advance interest and accrued interest, and make gain of your neighbors by extortion; and you have forgotten me, says the Lord God.